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Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Cordially seeking hypothetical prom date

Dear future prom date,

All I'm asking of you is that you're light on your feet, and have an expansive safe cracking knowledge. It also wouldn't hurt if you bore an uncanny resemblance to Matt Smith. (My obsessions come in waves, the current phase seems to be Doctor Who) I DIGRESS. I need to make a quick and illegal transaction at the bank to help pay off the debt I have accumulated after purchasing my nearly 10K "formal attire". Babysitting's just not gonna cut it. I don't even think babysitting Angelina and Brad Pitt's children would pay for half my dress. SO I've resulted to robbery. I'll be your useless sidekick. I can just stand next to you, while looking bad ass and Asian. There is ALWAYS a token Asian in every action movie. Hope you don't mind if this is the first and last time I ever see you. It keeps the mystery alive, but I hope you know that I am eternally grateful.

Sincerely,
The wannabe bond girl

Okay I kid, I kid. I wouldn't actually break and enter a building, let alone a bank just in order to pay for my designer prom dress. Obviously I would've resorted to selling myself first... Prom's coming up, or if you're school is like mine then it has already passed. Flashback to my Friday night; I fervently stalked every single Facebook album entitled "Prom" and salivated over all the gorgeous dresses. Call me a creeper. It's fine, I'VE LEARNED TO ACCEPT MY ROLE IN SOCIETY. I was like a thirteen year old girl again. My brain exploded with sequins, sparkles, tulle and chiffon. Being the egocentric and self-centered person I am... it got me thinking about what I'd want my prom dress to look like. I've drafted up two looks, both extremely whimsical and way out of my league. Unless between now and my senior year some wealthy benefactor decides to fund my prom expenditures I will most likely be showing up in a burlap sack. Talk about a fashion statement...

THE DRESSES COME WITH VIDEOS, THEY'RE THAT CLASSY. WATCH THEM, AND CRY.

1. Marchesa; Embellished silk-chiffon strapless gown $4,620
2. Jimmy Choo; Lotus crystal-embellished leather sandals $895
3. Billy Bride; Smokey topaz ring $345
4. Lancome; Coquette $29
5. ChloƩ; Rachel bow-embellished leather clutch $1,135
Total = $7024


1. Lavin; Pleated chiffon gown $5,185
2. Asos; Talullah Tu Crystal Stone Ring $27.70
3. Sasa Larissa Hadjio; Shrimp clutch bag $425
4. Jimmy Choo; Ontario metallic suede multi-strap sandals $775
5. Nars; Dolce Vita $24
Total = $6436.70



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